Blue Moon Tavern and Grill, Seattle, WA - Shocked friends, a few eavesdropping passers-by and the waitress all expressed disbelief when Stephenal J. Lavensusmanos disclosed his physical and highly sexual attraction to his spouse of 15 years. What started as a normal post-vocational visit to the pub, soon became a hot bed of gossip and intrigue as Lanvensumanos declared that he found his wife to be sexually attractive. Co-worker and fellow pub patron, Stephenal Flowerington called his claims to the court of public opinion and pressed him further for details. Lavensusmanos unbelievably declared "Well, she began losing a little weight and began exercising, you know, taking care of herself" to the horror of his compatriots in attendance. Flowerington, then called veteran Blue Moon Tavern and Grill waitress (who claims she has heard 'like everything working here') over to provide her loose change. After hearing Lavensusmanos story she expressed her disbelief and asked "Would you ever, you know, make a move on her?" Lavensusmanos responded in the affirmative but conceded that she may be 'too hot' for him now. He then declared that after a few more drinks he may 'go all in' this evening.
In a follow up conversation the next day Lavensusmanos and Flowerington discussed his awkward and fruitless attempt to start a conversation with her the previous night. "I hung out in the kitchen 'cause I know she goes there quite often and I kept thinking about what to say." According to his account, as his wife walked in the kitchen he got flustered and just blurted out something about the weather and laughed nervously. She then asked him to take out the trash and check on their slumbering kids. She may have mumbled something else while she walked away. He was not sure because he checked out her backside and got synaptically lost as she left the room. Lavensusmanos then confessed to a shameful session of semi-sober self gratification in the bathroom sink before falling asleep on the couch.
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